Week 10: A Taylor-Made Recap

Last week was absolutely nuclear for the Fellowship. Let's dive in and see what went down in the wasteland in week 10.

Dropped from rankings:

*(Points Scored x2) + (Points Scored Winning %) + (Points Scored * Winning % if played vs the median score of the week)

McQueen Kong vs. the Philadelphia Smeagles

Yeehaw! Josh thought he could wrangle himself a Kong this week and it was a close one. He must think he's a cowboy with how hard he rides the Texans defense. But at 16 points can you, blame him? Unfortunately, he can't ride the horses of the sea or the air, as Katie’s Seahawks dropped 22 points on Wakeford. This actually turned out to be a slugfest, with Stafford and Williams matching each other as stud QB's. However, former fantasy darling James Cook put out a mediocre meal and Justin Jefferson just isn't making a connection with the Vikings’ other JJ ( More on him later). Despite a disappointing two tight end set, Ashton Jeanty and a surprise Zach Charbonnet touchdown delivered Katie the W and keeps her in the running to win the West. Don't count Josh out though. You can never underestimate a Smeagol pining for a ring.

Bodega Cat vs the Algorithm

The writing was on the wall for Dom to eat an L. He had Juicy J McCarthy under center, a two tight end set and RJ Harvey as his RB2. Meanwhile, the Algorithm has been a machine this season, with his new Golden boy Jaxson Dart and while using dark arts to keep Christian McCaffrey regenerating at ghoul rates. But then one man and one man alone stood tall against the Terminator: John Conner…I mean Jonathan Taylor. With God-like speed and more willpower than all Green Lanterns combined, Taylor torched the field in Berlin worse than the bombing of Dresden. Almost 52 points! The highest scoring player this season. I'm sure Trevor had cold sweats all day, knowing that the boogeyman had taken his win before he even had a chance to seal it. He might be as concussed as his quarterback. But Dom will have to wake up from his dream, as Jonathan Taylor is on BYE next week.

Beerserkers vs Haribo Lecter

Abigail looked like she was in trouble in this one with a flaccid performance from Michael Penis Jr. But then like a ticking time bomb set way too long, it finally happened: TreyVeon Henderson SZN!!? The sleeping giant we all forgot about got red hot, dazzling on both the football field and the Fellowship scoreboard with an electric 30-point performance! Add JSN's reliable elite Production, and the Beerserkers were on their back foot. That's when the gates lifted, revealing the Cerberus of Jahmyr Gibbs, Kyren Williams, and Devante Adams. The Cerberus hadn't been fed for a while. And boy did it eat. TreyVeon's little boy detonation was more than matched by a Gibbs Fat Man drop of 38 points! Not to mention touchdowns from both Williams and Adams. Abigail looked like she was going to pull this one off, but Mike Penis just kept this one floppy. And everyone loses when it’s floppy. On the plus side, it's TreyVeon Henderson season, baby!

Detroit Lines vs. the Movie Chef

Tony walked away from his first win against Trevor like Bender after the Breakfast Club, with his fist held high. When he popped in the Detroit Lines cassette, Tony thought this was just another teen movie. Little did he know, he was Clueless. Jess played the femme foil who gets what she deserves: getting dumped by Sam Darnold, Kenneth Gainwell and Hunter Henry all in a row. Meanwhile, our nice guy Tony had another 24.9 dream date with his Prince Charming, Drake London. However, his table got flipped by solid performances by Chris Olave and Amon-Ra St. Brown, while Dallas Goedert and Rashid Shaheed stood around like cucks and just let him take it. The stakes all hinged on Monday Night Football, when Tony turned to his gallant QB to do something. But Hurts just put up 12 points, looked at Tony, said “I’m just not that into you” and walked off with Jess, securing her victory. Oh no, this was not another Tony Movie! It was a Chick Flick! The whole restaurant booed, because that Monday game sucked. Tony almost looked like he was going to go on a streak, only to falter at the last second. Meanwhile, Jess just saved her playoff dream. Both these teams still sit at the bottom of the East.

Average Boes vs. Jimmy da Kid

How low can the Boes go? A team skyrocketing above average is starting to sputter, with the team leader, 37-year-old NFL sophomore Bo Nix failing to break even six points. Despite a solid run game and adequate wide receiver performances, the Boes just couldn't break even. Meanwhile, Jimmy’s slow cooked Brissett has turned into a smoke show, while he's pulling the best out of former headaches like Juwan Johnson and Aaron Jones. Jimmy might have taken the W in this game, but Ron has a plan to turn his season around, which I'll get to later.

Rawbpeople vs Sacks in the City

The deviation in this matchup isn't as bad as the last, but the sadness might be even greater. Robby Flay had to take a bite out of a shit sandwich this week with Terrell Jennings and DJ Moore scoring a combined .5 points. His defense and kicker scored a combined zero. Meanwhile, Devon Achane went off the chain, ripping off an astounding 42 points! Rome came back to the fold and expected to slightly subpar stats allowed a list at a clinch victory at a solid 126.5 points. Not even Josh Allen can Houdini himself out of a deficit like that. Rob better foster his people before rivalry week or this can get ugly. Meanwhile, Alyssa remains a Divisional contender forced to tangle with Lecter next week.

Spaghetti Mafia vs Lulu Lemons

“What would you say to Atlas? I’d tell him to shrug”. That's exactly what Brock Bowers did. After putting the team on his back last week, Brock decided to let the rest of the Mafia take it from here, putting up 3.7 points. Luckily for Zach, his 3 receivers picked up the slack, with great performances from Jameson Williams, Emeka Egbuka and MHJ. Unluckily for Zach, he played against TE1 Trey McBride, who's apparently best served with Brissett. Put a little Ladd McConkey on that bad boy and you've got yourself a McUpset! No Garrett Wilson? No problem! Zach walks away with a nasty loss and a sidelined Marvin Harrison Jr. while Alex’s title defense chances stay alive.

Matchups weren't the only exciting part about this week. Traaaaade alert! Bodega Cat pulls off his second trade of the season, selling off the Motley Crue of Quinten Johnston, Harold Fannin Jr, and Kenneth Walker III to the Average Boes for the greatest prize of all: Josh Jacobs. Did Ron pull off the great trade robbery? Or did Dom just get his missing piece ahead of a crucial matchup against his rival ( yours truly)? 

We have a shake up at the number one spot in the league, with Dom's upset putting my Beerserkers in at the top spot. Despite leading the West, I'm tied with Alyssa and Katie based on record. Meanwhile Trevor's reign of terror in the East continues. But who cares about divisional politics when we have the real show on the horizon: rivalry week! Let's take a sneak peek at next week's match up mayhem. 

Beerserkers vs Bodega Cat: The top two scorers of week 10 and the top two points for teams face off…minus a Jonathan Taylor, plus a Josh Jacobs. 

Average Boes vs the Algorithm: Trevor has the chance to pass on the McSucken to Ron, while the Boes try to get back on track.

Rawbpeople vs Lulu Lemons: Alex throws a hail Mary to defend his crown while Rob tries to stop a recent slump and make it to the playoffs for the first time in 3 years.

Detroit Lines vs McConkey Kong: Jess tries to salvage a rocky season while Katie tries to make the playoffs for the first time. Is this a changing of the guard or a reversal of fate? 

Sacks in the City vs Haribo Lecter: Two wives who pretend not to care about fantasy that much but actually do. They'll each be checking their phones for this one.

The Movie Chef vs Philadelphia Smeagles: Josh tries to pull himself out of the mess he's made. A win for Tony would be therapeutic and give him ammunition at the next family gathering. 

Spaghetti Mafia vs Jimmy da Kid: No personal connection, just divisional animosity. 

Stay thirsty, Fellowship! The playoff push is upon us!

GG’s,

Tom